We should resist the urge to divide or compartmentalize our lives. Who you are, what you do, and what you want are all equally important parts of your identity. Your sense of shalom is essential to your sense of self-worth, value to others, and wellbeing.
Read MoreUnder normal circumstances, a megachurch pastor isn't able to eclipse the media's focus on a catastrophic natural disaster. However, instead of following our usual path (blaming the government), the public seems to have decided that Mr. Osteen is the true villain of Houston's massive flooding. Indeed, these are not normal circumstances...
Read MoreWhat about divorce? Divorce is obviously mentioned throughout the Bible. God Himself even experienced a divorce. So while we strive to live according to our "'til death do I part" vows, are there other Biblical reasons (aside from death) for a marriage to end? Is it possible to terminate a marriage covenant without sinning in the process?
Read MoreDue to the amplifying (or exacerbating) effects of marriage, it's utterly important that you attempt to understand what's at play and what you're working with before you get married. Here are a handful of questions that I think everyone should find answers to before they enter into the lifelong marital commitment.
Read MoreJudeo-Christian circles occasionally have some odd traditions and sentiments. Countless times, I've heard parents pray for their daughters to become women "like Ruth and Esther," two terrific protagonists in the Bible. It's such a popular sentiment that it even crept its way into 1970s show tunes via Fidler on the Roof. But it's weird. I wouldn't wish that on anyone, especially my own daughter.
Read MoreHusbands and wives generally don't appreciate unsolicited marriage advice. Even when facing high-risk situations, most people don't want someone else telling them what to do — they just want affirmation. But sometimes affirmation isn't healthy, just, nor deserved. Sometimes people need to be held accountable and asked to change. Sometimes unrelenting truth is the most merciful thing one can offer. And that's a bitter pill to swallow.
Read MoreWe make idols of our own plans when we trust in them to provide our sense of identity, purpose, success, and happiness. By seeking to assert our own desires over God's will, we prioritize ourselves before God. Worse, we often mistakenly assume that God's will is aligned with our own. In so doing, we attempt to make God in our own image, instead of conforming ourselves into the image of God.
Read MoreMyers-Briggs, Love Languages, The Birkman, Rorschach, DISC, Buzzfeed surveys, True Colors, Five Factors — they're all crap. Personality profiles don't matter.
Read MoreFear is a tool. We all use it, and we all have it used against us. While there is a healthy degree of fear, called caution, most fear-mongering is excessive and unhealthy. And nowhere are the devastating effects of our own fears more immediate and destructive than within our relationships.
Read MoreIn the New Testament (and, curiously, not really anywhere in the Old Testament), there are a few letters that seem to suggest that wives should be universally obedient to their husbands. Among the patriarchal obedience advocates, no epistle is more popular than 1 Peter. But what did Peter actually write?
Read MoreIf the goal is to produce humans with the best possible opportunities for success, we're not achieving our goal. We've tried the fire-and-brimstone approach, and we've tried the more "flexible" approach, but neither seems to make much of a difference. Which begs the question: What's missing?
Read MoreThey often didn't see it coming...
As it turns out, the signs of adultery are often glaringly obvious. Here are a few warning signs to consider when evaluating the strength of your marriage.
Read MoreI've talked to many couples facing seemingly doomed marriages. More often than not, the root cause isn't infidelity or addictions or crimes. Usually, the heart of a maritally disengaged spouse is summed up in a single statement: "I don't love my wife/husband anymore." It's tragic and heartbreaking. Mostly because it's based on a lie.
Read MoreYour wedding is literally only a few hours. It will come and go in a stressful blur. Weddings are irrational fantasies — people gussied up beyond their means, pretending to know how to waltz, eating cake they can't afford, wearing other people's tuxedos, and holding fake flowers. And, once the limo pulls away, you'll be left picking rice out of your hair and with a very real marriage.
Read MoreMarriages end with all sorts of excuses. The reality though is that marriages only end for ten reasons. If you've already read The Marriage Commandments, you know what those reasons are. You know the 10 principles you have to keep to keep your marriage strong. But most don't know. So, based somewhat on those 10 principles, here is a quick rundown of 10 ways you might be ruining your marriage.
Read MoreInstead of drawing close to our nine friends and excluding everyone else, we should pour out our lives for those who will be reconciled to God — especially when they may not share our beliefs. If we are truly the Body of Christ, we have to be willing to endure pain, discomfort, and disappointments. Self-preservation, whether it be of body, reputation, or ideas, should never be a deciding factor. As the Church, we must lay down our lives.
Read MoreThroughout the Bible, we can see God's purposeful inclusion of women. When we are inclusive of women, we're acting in the character of God. At many of Scripture's most pivotal moments, and at many of the first expressions of our theology, God granted women the honor of being the forerunners and standard-bearers. Moreover, we often see God granting revelation to women first.
Read MoreThere are many third rails in Church traditions. Among the most hotly contested over the last 2,000+ years pertains to what women should (or most often, should not) do within the Church. The feelings run so strong that the functions of women within churches often becomes the single most defining issue in many congregations.
Read MoreDo we really have to go to church? It's becoming increasingly unpopular, but let's re-examine what the Bible says about our obligation toward church involvement and let's address some of the ridiculous arguments made against going to church.
Read MoreIn Christianity, there are many traditions and taboos related to sexual activity. We have been taught that certain acts are inherently sinful. We've been taught that "Christian marriages" don't involve certain sexual expressions. "Good" men and women just don't do "that" ...
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